Present, play-filled mornings, anxiety-free afternoons, and more restful sleep. Cannabis just may be the antithesis of Mommy’s need for anti-anxiety and anti-depressant medications.
I am a great mother to my two little tikes. I embody patience and presence. Arguably the two hardest things to achieve in motherhood, and I owe a lot of my parental success to cannabis. My hope with this article is that you may reconsider cannabis as a natural and safe, spiritual-enhancing medicinal herb rather than an irresponsible and dangerous drug.
Parenthood has a medication problem.
According to parenting.com, parenthood has a medication problem. One in five mothers are on some sort of psychiatric medication, and the numbers are similar for fathers. The most commonly prescribed drugs to parents are antidepressants (11%), followed by anxiety medications (8%), and then sleep aids (6%).
Parents are a population most vulnerable to suffering from prolonged depression and anxiety. In fact, studies have shown that parents experience depression at rates twice that of the general population. Considering the physical and mental toll of parenthood in this day and age of parenting, I think medicating with reasonable amounts of cannabis makes incredible sense. Especially when cannabis, a natural non-addicting plant, can replace the highly addictive and potentially numbing effects of certain anti-anxiety and anti-depressant pharmaceuticals.
Cannabis is an alternative to psychiatric medication.
I’m not here to demonize prescription drugs, but I do believe that cannabis can be a better alternative to psychiatric medications. With cannabis, I’ve been able to feel more present in my daily life and find ways to relax without feeling the need for anti-anxiety or sleep aids. Here are just a few ways that cannabis makes me a better mom:
1. Cannabis helps me calm down when life’s moments are tense.
First and foremost, I calm the heck down. Some days, when life has me by the ovaries and the bills are stacked higher than my income, I can let the stress consume me and be in the worst of moods. For me, cannabis makes that bad mood and chaotic perspectives (literally) fade away. I can come back to the balanced, best version of myself around my sons. Fully present and trouble-free; ultimately humbled.
I’m sure you’ve been there too, right? Where you’re so upset and it has nothing to do with your child, yet your negative energy and nervous tensions seep into them anyway. Yup. That affects them. We need to do better to mitigate that. Cannabis helps.
2. Cannabis helps me play with my children with energy and flare.
One minute I can be exhausted, withdrawn, and absolutely not in the mood to play. The next, I’m belly-to-the-floor enthusiastically playing trains, loudly singing sing-alongs, solving puzzles, and building forts with my energetic baby boys. That’s cannabis for you.
It’s not that I can’t achieve this state while ‘sober’ I’m just more likely to be super into child’s play with blissful phytocannabinoids latching onto my endocannabinoid system. It is then that I have the heightened desire to play whatever it is my boys are playing. I am with them- in their world- supporting their imaginations. And the best part? Since I’m so engrossed in sharing that enthusiasm, they get deeper into the activities and explore their own identity even more! My presence matters to my children, and my enthusiasm supports their ability to thrive.
Present, play-filled mornings, anxiety-free afternoons, and more restful sleep. Cannabis just may be the antithesis of Mommy’s need for anti-anxiety and anti-depressant medications.
I also believe it’s my personality that allows for this kind of shared creativity and enthusiasm, it’s just sometimes I can’t reach that side of me because I’m so overwhelmed and/or slightly depressed. When I consume cannabis, I am no longer that defeated adult reluctantly riding along. No, no. I’m in full character ready for any adventure my child throws my way. That is what matters to a little one. Being there alongside them. This leads me to my next point.
3. Cannabis helps me become more present, which is exactly what my children need the most.
Good parents can all tell you what matters most to a child isn’t just how you treat them when you’re around or even how full you make their schedules– it’s whether or not their parent is present. That’s all there is to it. A successful parent is all about “being there for the little questions,” as Stephanie, mother to an adorable 3-year-old girl, so perfectly puts. It means you are there witnessing your child’s growth and their understanding of the world around them, in the littlest of detail.
When I consume cannabis, no matter how stressed out I am or how scatter-brained I may feel, I immediately come back to the present moment to take my child in. He is the only one I am focusing on and it is beautiful.
Since I am so present with them, I get to remember the little details of our fleeting moments together. For my six-year-old, I can still remember holding his tiny toes as an infant, inhaling the back of his soft neck to let those sweet baby notes fill my senses. I remember slowing time down and just soaking him in as we cuddled in the bed. I will cherish these memories forever. These tender moments will all go away someday (soon), and I refuse to let them pass without my noticing.
Early motherhood can be foggy, and cannabis can clear those misty clouds.
4. Cannabis helps me actively listen to my children.
Active listening is one of the greatest skills an individual can acquire. To actively listen means you keep eye contact, are free from any distractions, and respond on a deeper level. Active listening naturally creates a deeper relationship between the people involved. Unfortunately, this skill is becoming a lost art in our world of full plates and even fuller distractions. Being able to fully hear and absorb what another is communicating comes with time, knowledge of self, and mindfulness that cannabis can help cultivate.
When I consume cannabis regularly, I am very present with my children, as discussed above. But it also means that I am absorbing everything they say. My attention isn’t wandering or distracted while trying to explain a detailed dream they had the night before or share an event that happened at school today, I listen to every word they speak. I don’t want to forget a single syllable because it matters to them and in turn, it matters to me.
As an example, have you ever realized you’re so tired and aloof that your child is tugging on your clothes, yet you don’t even notice? Falling back into the theme of noticing the little things, cannabis can help a mom listen to her little ones, even when her mind is a tired mush.
This world can get so noisy that it tunes out our bonds to our young. Cannabis helps me to quiet the mind, the world around me, and tune in to my boys’ little ques. What is William trying to tell me through those babbles? What story from school does my oldest want to tell me? It brings me back to the intuition between babe and mother.
5. Cannabis helps me ground myself when the environment around me is chaotic, leading me to be more patient with my children.
Good parenting is not all fun and games, and by no means should any of us try to be our child’s best friend (I hear you will regret that by the teen years). With this comes consistency, structure, and boundaries… and I can’t say I’m the most structured person. Actually, I have very little structure. I’m more of an airy, go-with-flow kind of gal. So when I use cannabis, I become grounded and level-headed, which gives me the structure and focus I sometimes need when I feel in over my head and all out of whack.
Cannabis helps me set ground rules, and stick to my guns when our older boy is screaming that he doesn’t need to use the potty (when I know he NEEDS to)! It’s no fun picking up the pieces after stooping to his level when I know I should have done a better job of setting the ground rules in the first place. Children don’t respect a parent that acts like a helpless child.
Conclusion
Now let me be clear, I’m not saying parenthood is a diagnosis that should be treated with cannabis or medications. No way do I believe that. Substance abuse is very real, and individuals must rise up to the occasion and learn to deal with the ebbs and flows of parenting naturally. Parenting is just the way it is, challenging. However, some of us have pre-existing mental health conditions that can make parenting (and working and being a stand-up individual) more difficult to obtain. Don’t we deserve to know about plant medicines that can help us get through the tougher times naturally?
